Archive for June, 2008

June 30, 2008

Test of Love

by jarrodmartin1

Love is work.  I should probably end the post there, but I need to write this out for me so I’ll remember it and live it more consistently.

I’m coming up on my 10th Anniversary this August (thank you, thank you), and I’ve been trying to assess how well I’ve done loving my wife.  Those vows are doozies, you know.

richer or poorer: 9 (Until my wife took over the finances, I wasn’t doing as well, but since then, I think things are much better)

sickness and health: 8 (I cleaned up vomit, but docked myself points for watching a movie on my laptop during the labor portion of my daughter’s birth.  Technically, there was nothing I could do…but I wasn’t really helping the situation.)

better or worse: 8 (I could have loved better when we prayed for 2 years to have a child…those were some rough times, and I’d never had to love someone through something like that before.)

forsaking all others: 10 (okay, the death threats have helped…I kid, I kid)

That’s a final score of 45 out of 50 — 90%.

Okay, that’s how I would have assessed myself.  But, the more I thought about it, the more I fought against this idea of ranking love on a scale.  It seemed so…impersonal.  Besides, the numbers and the rankings are arbitrary — made up just to confirm my own confidence in my performance (or confirm my own guilt, depending on my mood).

The real test of love is one thing:  does the object of my affection feel loved?  Do my kids feel loved?  Does my wife feel loved?  Because even though I intend my actions to send love their way, the message might not be interpreted the way I intend.  The trick of love is that it has less to do with ME and more to do with HER/HIM.  Love is always focused on the other.

And you get tested every day.

Tags: ,
June 28, 2008

The Mortar between the Bricks

by jarrodmartin1

I thought more about yesterday’s post, I realized that there are several factors I’ve been considering on how to build gap into my work schedule.  Because I’m employed by The Journey Church (and CCHS), then my employer should have some say in how many hours I work.  And, as with most jobs, there are duties that exist outside those normal hours.  However, I am the one ultimately responsible for my schedule.  Here are the factors I consider as I’m thinking about how to create discipline in my schedule.

season of life and season of ministry

Earlier this year, Craig Groeschel wrote about this very idea on his blog, and it has stuck with me.  Perhaps his post “Ministry Within the Seasons” was the impetus for this very journey to understanding discipline in my life?  Who knows?

He points out that different seasons of ministry call for different work schedules, and I agree.  I have two kids now.  That changes how I create my work schedule, and it influences how much time I can give extra to the church and ministry.  But, too, I have to try to balance the season of life with the fact that our church is only 3 years old.  Leadership is in short supply right now, and I have to shoulder a lot more than I will in a few years (if I do my job well!).

talk

What I’m trying to do to find the right rhythm is stay in communication with my wife.  This is key because when I don’t communicate to her what’s going on, and I’m gone to meetings and helping with events and working on ministry stuff, then she gets resentful.  She doesn’t get to be part of my life and schedule because I leave her out. But when I let her know that a tough few weeks is ahead, and that after that I will be much more free, she can brace herself for that time.  And, we can work together to find ways to spend time as a family, despite my busy schedule.

walk

I watch my kids closely and listen to them.  About a month ago, Isaac (age 3) asked me, “Do you have to go to church tonight?”  When I said, “No,” he perked up and asked, “Then can we play chase?”  I’ve got to be aware that I explain, in terms they can understand, where and why I’m going.  And, I need to make sure that I’m explaining my love (verbally and physically) to them as much as possible.  My wife has also mentioned that during days where they don’t see much of me, they get very irritable and difficult to deal with.  If that’s happening, I know I need to be careful how I plan my schedule.

chalk

Who can do what I’m doing?  I’ve become much more aware of the things I spend my time doing, and I’ve started to look aggressively for people to do what I do.  If I don’t replace myself, when I die, I’ll still be doing everything I’m doing right now!  Teaching and training other people is now a part of my consideration of my schedule.  Who can go with me, work with me, do this with me?

Brick by Brick

As Craig says in that blog post I mentioned above, balance is impossible to achieve.  A healthy rhythm is the aim.  I agree mostly with that, but I can easily use the “this season of ministry just requires more of me” excuse every week.  I can always find more to do, more to read, more to improve, more to add to my schedule.  But what is impossible to do is add mortar once you’ve stacked the bricks.  And bricks without mortar don’t stick together. They fall…easily.  But with mortar — which creates a gap — those bricks become a foundation that is solid and true.

I want my family and my ministry to be a wall, not a stack of bricks.

June 27, 2008

God of the Gaps — A Prayer

by jarrodmartin1

As I was praying this morning, something popped into my head that I hadn’t really given much thought before.  I mean, I’ve read things and heard leaders talk about this, but for some reason, today it made sense.  If only I can make it sensible here…

How much do I have to work in order to see God move in people’s lives?  My tendency is to give all that I can.  Instead of watching TV now, I plan next month’s meeting.  A few spare minutes before dinner gets finished…use it to check email.  What ends up happening is that I don’t discipline my schedule at all.  Work bleeds over into free-time and family time, and vice versa.

I think where I mess up is thinking that “living for God” is synonymous with “working for God.”  As a staff person at The Journey, I have responsibilities and events and meetings.  And, I want our church environments and programs and ministries to be excellent to reach people far from God, so I don’t mind giving a lot of time to the work of God.  But, as I prayed this morning, it became very clear to me that this can be a very undisciplined way of living — and ungodly.

If I don’t spend enough time with my family and let them know that they are a priority in my life, will God bless the extra hours I’m giving to ministry work?  If I steal time from my own leisure activities and rarely just sit and relax, will God’s movement be more visible in my life?

I don’t think so.

The real question running in my head this morning was this:  Do I trust God to take my offering of my time and my resources and multiply it for the glory of His Kingdom?

Perhaps, I need to discipline my work schedule to include some gaps as well.  I create gaps in my finances as I give.  I step out in faith to give a certain percentage of my income to God (and even extra to Kidstuf this year), and I’m trusting God to meet me there in that gap.

Why don’t I do that with my time?  Why don’t I set some clear boundaries and trust Him to meet me there in the gaps?

June 25, 2008

100 MPG — A Passionate Discipline

by jarrodmartin1

Okay, if you want to see an example of passionate discipline, this article shows it. Here’s an excerpt from Chris Woodyard’s report in USA Today.

“Hypermilers practice such unorthodox techniques as coasting for blocks with their car’s engine turned off, driving far below speed limits on the freeway, pumping up tire pressure far beyond car and tire makers’ recommendations and carefully manipulating the gas pedal to avoid fuel-burning excess.”

I wonder if my candy-apple red Mercury Sable could get 40 or 50 mpg?

read more | digg story

June 25, 2008

Loving the Practice

by jarrodmartin1

In high school, I used to shoot free-throws from 7:30 a.m. to 8:00 a.m. at school.  My mom is a teacher, and we’d get to school before anyone else, so I had the gym to myself.

In four years of high school, I can’t estimate the number of practice shots I took.  Thousands and thousands.  My practice was a discipline.  I loved the results of my practice — I became the best free-throw shooter on the team.  And, here’s the crazy part I was thinking about today:  I loved the practice!

I actually miss that practice.  I don’t play competitively anymore, but I’d still love to be able to shoot hundreds of shots a day — just for the discipline of it.  There’s something satisfying about knowing that I’m doing something that few others are willing to do.

So why don’t I find discipline in my finances enjoyable?  Or, discipline in my eating habits?  Or, my prayer time?  The value of these things far outweighs shooting some free-throws.

Here’s what I’ve come up with:

  • I view self-discipline as unenjoyable, so I don’t make any effort to find the joy in other activities.  Maybe I should start looking for what is “fun” about these other things to create a sense of fulfillment in the practice itself.
  • I don’t stick with anything long enough to make it a real part of my life.  Instead, I dabble in a “little of this, little of that” discipline.  I shot free-throws for four years — I don’t think I’ve every done anything else that long.
  • I don’t take scheduled breaks from other self-disciplines.  I took breaks from free-throws on holidays and in summer when school was out.  I wonder if I could schedule certain “breaks” from my other practices that would allow me to keep it fresh.
  • I don’t have confidence in myself.  With free-throws, I felt completely at ease that if I shot a lot of free-throws, I’d get better.  I’m not sure I believe that not eating donuts will make me any healthier, or saving more money each month will make my future more secure.

I’ll have to think about this some more.  Can any discipline be made enjoyable?

June 24, 2008

Routine Busted

by jarrodmartin1

Oh, you might think that I’ve already given up.  But you’d be wrong.  The early sound of my ipod alarm did it’s job, and I was ready.  I was up for half an hour when the new routine went awry.

Is that a truck pulling into my driveway?  What’?!  The roofing guys are here this early? Loud laughter.  Shouts.  Ladders bumping.  Emma’s awake.  Ahhhhh!

So much for new routines.  I’m typing this while I try to read a book to Emma.  My wife has moved from our bedroom to the guest room at the other end of the house, away from the banging and thumping above.  Hold on…Emma wants a hug…

Later.  Breakfast must be served.

(P.S.  I am very glad these guys are going to fix the roof — it is in bad shape.)

June 23, 2008

I’m Tired of Living with Velcro

by jarrodmartin1

Velcro is amazing.  I just don’t want a suit made of it.  Lately, I’ve felt like I’m wearing this sweet Armani velcro, and everything I walk past just sticks to me.  Here, read this article on Digg.  Take care of the church web site.  Plan next semester’s classes.  Look for a new ipod.  Buy new books.  Play with the kids.

Velcro can suck.  So, I’ve tried to start a new routine because what seems to be sticking to me isn’t necessarily what I would choose.  I rarely get to sit and relax with my wife on the couch.  I’ve either got my laptop out working on something or playing with this blog.  Those things aren’t necessarily bad, but I’ve started to make that the norm.  So I’m going to start leaving most of my evenings free.

That means I’m getting up a lot earlier in the mornings to do my work and blog.  This morning — 5:30 am.  Actually, I’m very excited about this change, even though getting up that early will be difficult when it is dark outside.  Right now, the sun is coming up about that time, and it makes me feel alive.

Just a few reasons this new schedule will make my life better:

  • I’ll have more time to focus on loving my wife and kids.
  • I won’t feel pressure throughout the evening to “hurry up” and get to my laptop to blog.
  • I’ll be forced to get in bed at a decent hour, rather than staying up later than my brain is able to write.
  • I’ll have a more disciplined prayer time since I’ll be up already.
  • I won’t feel guilty for blogging.

Most of my life I’ve fought being “disciplined” with the opinion that discipline is for boring people.  Now I’m realizing that discipline is freedom.  When I discipline myself, I establish priorities and free myself from the useless activities that attach themselves like velcro to my schedule.  I’m tired of living with Velcro.  I don’t want just anything sticking to me.  I want to have the choice.

June 22, 2008

Second Sunday on the Job

by jarrodmartin1

Recently, my responsibilities at The Journey Church have changed.  For the past three years since our launch (09.11.05), I’ve been the Connections Pastor.  I helped people get connected into small groups, or as we call them LifeTeams.

Now, I’m moving more into the technical and creative side of Sundays.  I now lead all areas that happen in our Sunday worship gatherings:  video, audio, music, graphics, and design.  Basically, I’m a producer.  I make sure the experience on Sundays is engaging, inspiring, and fun.

Last week, we had too many errors.  One song didn’t even have words on the screens for people to read!  So, this week.  I’ve got to step it up.

Who knows what first-time guest will show up and judge God based on what they see, hear, and experience at our church?  Will the static in the audio be distracting?  Will the video be “cheezy”?  Will our worship seem fake?  I just want our Sunday morning to be a unified expression of how great God is.  I want to give my best for the One who gave all for me.

Is that crazy?

June 22, 2008

Wind Turbines — When can I get one?

by jarrodmartin1

Check this article out: Vertical-Axis Wind Turbines from CleanTechnica.

We could solve much of the energy crisis by looking into putting these on top of skyscrapers, in the middle of subdivisions, and in third-world countries to provide cheap power.

Why aren’t we? Why is this something we’re just considering rather than adopting?

We’ll buy the next iPhone that gives us faster internet, pay hundreds of dollars a month just to keep it connected. But we won’t get excited over buying these or investing in these companies?

What’s wrong with us?

read more | digg story

June 21, 2008

First Bloggers on the Moon

by jarrodmartin1

Google will rule the world, and probably most of outer space.  Take a look at CNN’s article by A. Pawlowski on Google’s new mission.  In the article Google’s representative for the X Prize project, Tiffany Montague says this:

“‘What I think this prize is really about is inspiring young minds and inspiring the global population to compete for a dream…’”

What if a private group of citizens builds a spacecraft, a moon-exploring vehicle, and gets to the moon?  Google has been a large influence in giving power to the little guy by offering so many cool, free apps:  Reader, Docs, Gmail, Calendar.  Now, they’re sponsoring a contest encouraging people to dream big, to explore the final frontier.  If Google can make information and the management readily available and free to all, will we soon be going to the moon for free?

Why not? 

  • Google offers free rides, and charges advertisers fees to have their commercials and ads running during the flight.  (Maybe companies will even do seminars, like they do with time-shares in Florida.  “Yeah, you get a free ride, just listen to our sales pitch.”)
  • Google sets up a space station on the moon, complete with Wi-Fi, a Starbucks, and live music from Nine Inch Nails, who has seen that by giving their music away, they can charge huge fees for their moon concerts.  Of course, bloggers cover the whole thing, and Google later puts the whole thing on YouTube, giving new meaning to the phrase “the views on this page are sky-rocketing!”
  • Google buys Disney to set up Disney Galaxy, an interactive family adventure park. 

What are your ideas?